Minimizing the Effects of Divorce on Children

Divorce |

Divorces are often hard for everyone, especially children. With so much pain, emotion and frustration involved in the situation, it is easy for parents to lose sight of how their actions can affect their children. Here are a few ways to minimize the effects of divorce on children.


Divorces are often life changing situations where the lines of communication often break down between all parties that are involved. In nasty divorces, the parents tend to yell and argue with each other, and the children tend to become angry and withdrawn. Instead of resorting to negative behavior in an effort to make yourself heard, try communicating in a normal and positive manner. Both parents have to make a conscious effort to restore the lines of communication so that their children do not blame themselves or their parents and resort to holding their emotions inside. Continue reading

Getting Through Your Divorce with Therapy

Therapy | DivorceAdviceForChildren.comDivorce is never a simple thing. With years of pent up anger, guilt, shame, and myriad other emotions brewing between two people who once thought that they would spend the rest of their lives happily together, divorce is often one of the most stressful and traumatic events in a person’s life. When you add children into the mix, things get even more complicated. While the two consenting adults may be better off apart, children rarely are and don’t get a say in the matter. This can be a particularly damaging situation for children as they search for answers to why their parents no longer love each other. Continue reading

Try Art Therapy As a Way To Work Through Your Parents’ Divorce

Art Therapy | DivorceAdviceforChildren.comIf your parents are going through a divorce, there’s a good chance that it’s taking its toll on you. There’s a good chance that you’re feeling many emotions like anger, frustration, sadness, confusion, or fear. Sometimes it’s difficult to have to manage all these emotions, and it can be even more difficult to find a way to express them in words.

Art therapy is a tool you can use to work through your emotions. It’s a form of therapy that works with the images in your mind. At times, when the mind and heart is inflicted by heavy emotions and challenging thoughts, art is a way to easily and safely express what’s going on inside. Along with emotions and thoughts that are difficult to bear, you might even have images that show up in your mind. For example, you might have an image of what it might be like after your parents’ divorce, such as living with your father and what that might be like. Or you might have an image of living far from your friends, and this image might invoke sadness or anxiety. Continue reading

If Your Parents Are Divorcing, Don’t Do Drugs, Try This

Support GroupIf your parents are going through a divorce, there’s a lot you must be feeling. There’s a lot you’re probably going through. Although there’s very little that can actually take the pain away, there are many resources that can help you manage the pain. And that’s what this article will provide. It will give you some resources so that you can help yourself get through a challenging time.

First, you should know that depending on your age, you’re going to experience different things. As you can imagine, divorce can have significant impacts on the children of the family. However, those influences depend on the age(s) of the children, and they are far more significant if children are under the age of 5. Nonetheless, the consequences for pre-teens and adolescents can create a lot of havoc. There are significant concerns for teens as a result of divorce, even without notice at first, that warrants attention, tenderness, and care. For example, depression might arise slowly and get more serious over time if not tended to. The point is depending on your age, you might be feeling more of an impact from the divorce.

Research shows that pre-teens and adolescents who experience a divorce suffer in their self-esteem, academic performance, peer relationships, behavior, and physical health. It might be obvious that mental health issues also begin to surface such as teen anxiety and teen depression. Suddenly, you might feel an instability in the family structure. You might feel as though you’re free to try what you want. You might think to yourself, “Well, my parents are caught up in the divorce, so they won’t notice the drug experimentation that I do.”

But don’t let yourself be fooled by this. Even though you might be pulled to use drugs, especially because they can feel like a way to cope with difficult feelings, those drugs are dangerous and could lead to addiction, poor grades, risky situations, ruined friendships, and self-harm. Here’s what can happen as a result of divorce, and drugs can only make it worse:

  • Academic problems
  • Trouble sleeping
  • Stress and worry
  • Sadness or anger towards one or both parents
  • Depression
  • Suicidal Ideation and perhaps attempts
  • Having trouble with authority at school or with the police
  • Trouble getting along with siblings, peers, and parents
  • Getting involved with sexual activity


Yes, the divorce your parents are going through can create challenging emotions in you like embarrassment, fear that your parents will abandon you, grief, worry about your parents’ well being, anxiety about who you’re going to live with, fear that one of your parents will forget about you, and maybe even an unrealistic hope that your parents will get back together, setting you up for disappointment. Despite all of these feelings, don’t let drugs be your coping mechanism. Instead, try the items listed below.

  • Join a support group of other children your age whose parents are going through a divorce.
  • Find a mental health professional and start attending therapy. This can be a way to get your feelings out with someone you can trust.
  • Find friends whose parents went through a divorce. Talk to them and find out what it was like for them.
  • Journal, write poetry, dance, draw. Art can be a way to get your feelings out too.

Research also shows that divorce can have a stronger negative impact than other events like moving, a new sibling in the family, the death of a family member, or illness. Because it can be so challenging, it’s important to get the help  you need. See if you can find a teacher, counselor, or another adult you trust to support you.